AI7, Semi-finalists, Guys x 12 (02/19)

So, they go with a theme night right out of the box (songs from the ‘60s). Usually they let the semi-finalists sing whatever they want, which I think is more fair, but whatever. Seacrest calls this bunch the “best talent ever,” which 1) they say every year and 2) will be trumped by next year’s crop.

Can I say that Ryan Seacrest is very, very, very lucky. He’s a twit by all accounts. No one likes him. Yet he’s mega famous for hosting this show. This show could run itself. Really anyone could introduce the contestants and feign a witty repartee with the judges. He just happened to get the golden ticket. Life’s funny that way.

Such is the same for Paula Abdul. She’s the one that they chose from the beginning. And, at first, her name carried her and added recognition to the show, since NO ONE knew who Randy or Simon was. But I can’t understand what she’s saying half the time. Or understand the point she is trying to make. As a matter of fact, tonight my wife Kristin pointed out on more than one occasion that the end of her sentence didn’t match how she began. I wish she were wittier. Or funnier. Something. Simon deserves an equal when it comes to put downs and banter back and forth. Paula is not a worthy (or is it wordy?) opponent. Not by a mile.

01 – David Hernandez, Glendale, AZ (Midnight Hour)

He reminds me a bit of last year’s contestant Rudy Cardenas. And a little like David Segura (from back home). His beginning was good, but then he faltered a bit in the middle and end. Overall has a nice voice and good control though. Randy said way to start it off. Paula called his vocals brilliant and said he had a perfect vibrato (which is different than most contestants who have a fast vibrato). Simon said it was better than he thought it would be, but told him to loosen up. I think he was okay. Middle of the road. Should be safe Thursday night.

02 – Chikezie, Inglewood, CA (More Today Than Yesterday)

The first male contestant to go by one name. Interesting. Have you ever played the name game? The one where you say a person/celebrity/sports figure and the next person has to say a person with the first initial in the first name from the first initial of the previous person’s last name? So, if I said Jason Kidd, you’d have to say someone with a first name starting with “K,” like Kevin Durant. Then you could said David Beckham, etc. We were playing once with sports personalities and someone said, let’s say, Willie Parker. I said, “Pele. Game over,” and walked out the door. Get it? Because Pele didn’t have a last name, much like Chikezie… Okay, stupid story. How about the suit Gary Coleman, er, Chikezie was wearing? It looked like it was out of Willie Wonka’s closet. My buddy Dante and I had a running joke that if we ever won the Excalibur Guild award at work (which entitles you to walk across the stage at our National Sales Meeting), we’d buy NBA Draft suits. You know those suits that the rookies wear on the night they get drafted. The 7 button, loud color, sometimes with pinstripes deals? Well, a broken clock is right twice a day and Dante and I finally did win the Excalibur award, but we tempered our enthusiasm and settled on just buying a new tie. Back to Chikezie. Randy called him an old fashioned singer and wanted him to make it fresh. Paula called him a throwback and loved his infectious smile. Simon hated the whole performance and called it corny and cheesy. I kind of agree with Simon, which is why I’m rocking the tie next month and not the new suit… I think Chikezie could be in trouble on Thursday.

03 – David Cook, Blue Springs, MO (Happy Together)

It’s funny, my wife Kristin and I have done 180s (or according to Jason Kidd, 360s) on David. I liked David in the auditions, but not so much now. She didn’t warm to him and now thinks he’s got a Daughtry-like feel to him. I think he worked the mike stand adequately tonight but I really thought he did a karaoke version of this song and totally played to the camera too much. Randy said he started weird but made it a rock joint, and added that “dawg, it was good.” Paula called it “worthy” of just praise. She was trying to be clever because Simon called his audition “a bit worthy” or “wordy” but he doesn’t remember the context in which he said it. Simon said he shouted a bit in the middle, but it was good and almost made it believable. I think David will be safe.

04 – Jason Yeager, Grand Prairie, TX (Moon River)

Jason’s son looks like Matt Damon and I think Jason looks a bit like Chet from Weird Science (Bill Paxton), which also makes him look like Ryan Leaf. He missed a note at the beginning of the song but has a nice voice. Song didn’t suit him though and that may be his downfall. Randy thought he lost his concentration a bit in the middle of the song. Paula said it reminded her of her first ballet recital. Simon thought it was much older and said it had a cruise ship feel to it. I agree. Jason’s on thin ice on Thursday.

05 – Robbie Carrico, Melbourne, FL (One)

He’s the boy bander turned rocker. He was in a band called Boyz N Girlz United and here a website dedicated to him (http://www.angelfire.com/me3/robbiecarrico/). Gotta love angelfire and those free webpages people created on that server. Robbie sure has changed his look, coming out with the long hair, beard, ‘do rag and prison issue grey jumpsuit. Randy said it moved him. Paula called it the perfect song for him. Simon said it was the only performance so far that was a current performance. I’m torn on Robbie. I think he’s a’ight, but he looks a bit like Seth Green and he’s no David Archuleta…

06 – David Archuleta, Murray, UT (Shop Around)

My wife Kristin said this is hot (but not like how Paris Hilton says it) and that it gave her chills. He’s got a silky smooth voice which belies his 17 years. It’s funny though, the USA Today guy didn’t like him. I thought he was head and shoulders better than everyone else and has a confidence when he’s singing, but a naivety and “aw shucks” personality when he’s not. Almost like Melinda from last year, but less obvious and more believable. I really think he’s awed by the crowds and judges. Without even hearing the girls, I’m proclaiming him to be the favorite. Randy is a big fan and said he was born with this gift of song. Paula called it a bold song choice and that he has a confident older soul. Simon simply said when you’ve got it, you’ve got it and David’s got it. I agree.

07 – Danny Noriega, Azusa, CA (Jailhouse Rock)

Came out in a nice Reservoir Dogs outfit (Mr. Pink anyone?). He really can sing, but this song didn’t really showcase his range. Randy said he knows how to have a good time. Paula called it very warm (he said he wanted to do something hot in his intro) and a safe song choice. Simon said it was verging on grotesque. I wouldn’t go that far, but I think it’s hard to have 18 year olds try to pick a song from the ‘60s that they might not be familiar with and have them try to make it their own. I think Danny’s safe on Thursday though.

08 – Luke Menard, Crawfordsville, IN (Everybody’s Talkin’)

I thought at first this guy looked like the dad in Field of Dreams but then the thought turned to Tony Romo, current quarterback of the Dallas Cowboys and ex-boyfriend of both Carrie Underwood and Jessica Simpson. It was funny how the media blamed Jessica Simpson for the fall of the Cowboys this year. Dan Patrick coined her Yoko Romo! My wife Kristin thought he withheld on this song and was too reserved. Randy said it was pitchy, consistently sharp. Paula didn’t feel it was the best song choice. Simon called it forgettable. I think he’s in trouble on Thursday night. He’ll probably be in the bottom 3. I hope he makes it through to redeem himself.

09 – Colton Berry, Staunton, VA (Suspicious Minds)

I thought he looked like William Zabka from Karate Kid fame but then he said that he gets Ellen DeGeneres a lot. What a tough person to look like! But at least he owns it. Randy said he did a pretty good job. Paula said it was nice to see a different side of him. Simon said it was okay and not quite as bad as the other Elvis song. I think Colton’s safe for Thursday, but won’t make it to the final 12.

10 – Garrett Haley, Elida, ID (Breaking Up Is Hard To Do)

This poor kid is overmatched. He was nasal and pitchy and was really the only one that didn’t look like he belonged tonight. When they did the closeups he looked and even sounded like a girl. Like he could be Barbara Mandrell’s daughter. Yes, he does look like Leif Garrett. And Peter Frampton. Randy said he didn’t do anything with the song. Paula said the slow tempo brought the performance down. Simon called it boring and whiny. He’s definitely in the bottom 3 and should be put out of his misery.

11 – Jason Castro, Rockwall, TX (Daydream)

Dude’s got pretty eyes, which I bet the chicks dig. Nice voice, but I didn’t think it was that great of a song choice. Randy liked the accent but said he had pitch problems. Paula said it blew her away and it was the right song choice. Simon called it in the top 2 performances and that he “gets it.” I thought it was better than most, but not really deserving of that much praise. Jason’s definitely safe on Thursday.

12 – Michael Johns, Buckhead, GA by way of Australia (Light My Fire)

I now think Michael looks like a cross between Tim Daly (Wings, Private Practice) and Ian Michael Black. He did okay with this song, but my wife Kristin thinks he’s better than this song. Randy likes him because he throws all caution to the wind. Paula called it an excellent way to end the night. Simon called him the most consistent contestant and that he has the natural charisma of a lead singer, which is high praise from him. I think he’s safe for Thursday and into the top 12.

Top 3 – David Archuleta, Michael Johns and Jason Castro

Bottom 3 – Garrett Haley, Luke Menard, Jason Yeager/Chikezie

These guys are definitely the strongest guys the competition has ever had. And the shortest. Ryan Seacrest actually looks tall compared to some of them.

And Dancing With The Stars just announced their 12 new celebs which include Kristi Yamaguchi, Penn Gillette, Adam Carolla, Marlee Matlin, Monica Seles, Jason Taylor, Shannon Elizabeth and Priscilla Presley. I love that show.