AIVI recap, Finalists x 12 (03/13)

These first few recaps are tough. Two hours is a lot of singing when the singers aren’t all good. Seacrest comes out in a 3 piece suit, but it’s grey with earth tones for the shirt and tie. Did Al Davis dress him?

Tonight is the music and career of Diana Ross, who also serves as the guest mentor. As they are showing her old pics, she looked a lot like Michael Jackson, if he stayed black and kept his original nose. She mentioned in the intro that she felt like a parent to these kids and I wondered if she had kids. Little did I know that she had 5, one of them being a “Love Child” with Berry Gordy (actress Rhonda Ross Kendrick). Actress Tracee Ellis Ross (“Girlfriends”) is also her daughter.

Okay onto the singers. And I put their pre-show odds to win it all, courtesy of sportsbook.com (yes, you can bet on this; I won on Taylor Hicks last year at 5 to 1).

01 – Brandon, You Can’t Hurry Love (40-1)

Loved his paint pallet shirt. Must’ve shopped at Sherman Williams this week. I think he has a good voice, but he has no real charisma. And he forgot the words!! If this was Hollywood, he would have been immediately excused. Randy said he reverted back to a background singer, but his last 2 notes were good. Paula said it’s not easy and nerves play a big part of it. She didn’t want to focus on what he did wrong (forgetting the words), but the many things he does right. Simon called it a complete letdown, a predictable arrangement and he has no star quality. I like Brandon but I agree with Simon. He belongs in the background. Melinda has overcome those 10 feet to become a lead singer. He belongs 10 feet back singing backup.

02 – Melinda, Home (3-2)

Okay, I’ve discussed who she looks like and Jayna Nakashima said that she looks like D.W., Arthur’s sister (it’s a kids’ cartoon). I’m going one step further by saying she looks like her, but with Dorothy the Dinosaur’s body (no neck, hardly a torso). Diana said she gave her goose bumps when she sang. Melinda did wear a classy silver dress tonight, but her belt was at her bustline and it accentuated her short torso. Funny looking notwithstanding, Melinda is still my favorite. Great voice. Great story (being the meek, timid background singer). I don’t think she’s as timid as they’re playing her up to be, but I’m still one of her biggest fans. Randy said it wasn’t his favorite performance for her, but she was still real, real strong. Melinda’s performance and ensuing tears when she heard the crowd roar made Paula cry too. Simon asked her why she was crying and Melinda replied that she’s never heard such a noise for her. She can’t fake that. I was moved. Didn’t cry, but I felt the emotion. Simon went on to say that she made a very boring song fantastic. Called her a young Gladys Knight. Paula described her feelings as an out of body experience. I really, really like Melinda. I hope she wins, but she’s already won. There is a recording contract for her whether it comes from American Idol or some other producer.

03 – Chris Sligh, Endless Love (6-1)

Chris said that he and Diana had similar hair. That was funny. When he went over his arrangement with her, you could tell she didn’t like it (but she didn’t shoot it down like Queen did to Ace last year). She told him to find the melody and hold on to it. He came out sans the glasses and it looked kinda weird with his beady little eyes among all the hair. His version sounded like a fast remix of a slow song. Christina Aguilera has a fast version of “Reflection” that this reminded me of. And it also had a Coldplay vibe to it (not that I’m really current enough to know Coldplay). It was a weird remix, but I still think that Chris has a smoove voice. Randy bagged on the Coldplay copycat and called it a mess. Paula said he had to worry about trying ultra hard to be ultra hip. Simon said he murdered the arrangement and that even the boos were light. It was odd because this song is supposed to be a love song, yet he sang it without a lot of emotion. The guys are in an odd place, especially Sligh and Blake because they have to make songs their own, but they run a fine line between making it their own and butchering the original. Sometimes the judges send mixed signals. Sometimes it’s you didn’t make it your own. Other times is it doesn’t matter how you sing it, just sing it well. Whatever. Chris should be safe tomorrow.

04 – Gina, Love Child (25-1)

As I mentioned before this song was in reference to the “love child” that Diana had with Berry Gordy (who also is the father of Rockwell, nice ‘80s reference). What was Gina wearing tonight? What was up with those pants? They weren’t jeans, right? Were they leather? Or pleather? What was up with that tribal necklace? Did she miss some notes? I still like Gina though. She’s not going to win, but she deserves to stay longer than most of the guys and Haley. Randy said it wasn’t his favorite performance, that there was no excitement. Paula said she’s much better than how she did tonight. Simon said he can’t say much about it. It wasn’t terrible, but it also wasn’t fantastic. He liked that she stayed in her image, but it was a forgettable, middle of the pack performance. Middle of the pack should keep her around to next week though.

05 – Sanjaya, Ain’t No Mountain High Enough (30-1)

Is he still in this competition? Well, www.votefortheworst.com has adopted him as their poster boy and I guess Howard Stern was urging his listeners to vote for him tonight to keep him in the competition. And DialIdol.com has him currently in 3^rd. I don’t think he’s leaving us tomorrow. With his hair like it was tonight, he kinda looked like Mario Van Peeples. My buddy Leroy thought he looked like Stoney Jackson from the Beat It video. I thought they were going “boy, girl, boy, girl,” but I guess they broke the pattern here. Poor Sanjaya. He has such a weak, timid voice. Seriously, what did they see in him to put him through? I think the Stepmom version of this song was better than his. Randy didn’t even know what to say. It wasn’t very good and thank god for the background singers. They really overshadowed him. How bad is that? Paula said he had the sweetest soul and he sang on pitch, but he needs to grab the audience. And she added that he looked adorable. How insightful! That’s why she makes the big bucks. Simon said Diana was going to freak when she heard that. But he was nice and said he’s brave. Unfortunately, we’ll probably have to put up with him for another week or so. Jim Rutter said it wouldn’t surprise him if Jacko and Eldra “El” DeBarge had spent some time together at Neverland Ranch, with Sanjaya as a result. And Jim also has WAY too much knowledge of El DeBarge songs. But then again, I probably know way too much about The Jets too…

06 – Haley, Missing You (100-1)

I can’t believe that Haley is still in and Sabrina is out. Haley reminds me a bit of Rachel Ray, but not really. And I’ve heard this from a few people but Haley reminded them of a darker Gloria Estefan. What was up with the bottom of her dress tonight? Was it a sash that fell? And how could you not notice the Dream Catcher earrings? She was a mess tonight. She forgot the words. She broke down when the judges gave their comments. She really reminds me of a cabaret/wedding singer. Can you tell she’s not my fave? Randy said she gave it a valiant effort but the pitch was all over the place. Paula started out by saying she looked lovely (kiss of death), but she forgot her words and the pitch was not good. She was about to breakdown and Simon said that he didn’t think it was that bad. And that she had a real presence up there. Honestly, I think he did what he claims he never does and that was to patronize her. Had he really given it to her like she deserved, she would’ve broken down and cried. I think she’s awful. I hope she’s gone tomorrow, but I’ll let suffer through another week of her if it means Sanjaya is gone.

07 – Phil, I’m Gonna Make You Love Me (40-1)

My wife calls him Stacey Phil, as in close your eyes when he sings and you’ll imagine a woman with a husky voice (like Cher). June Yasuhara called him Pee Wee Herman (it’s the eyes). His skull is shaped like ex-Warrior Tyrone Hill, who incidentally, was unofficially named to the all-ugly NBA team (along with Sam Cassell, Nick Van Exel, Popeye Jones and Gheorghe Muresan, although the Muresan was a cheap shot because he suffered from a pituitary disorder (I think it was termed Gigantism and was the same condition that Andre the Giant had)). Imagine if Tyrone Hill played Powder. Now you see Phil Stacey. Randy called his performance boring, but his vocals were hot. Paula said he needed to be more uptempo but the vocals were strong. Simon thought he chose the right tempo and that it was just OK. He has a tendency to shout his words, but he was better than last week. I don’t think Simon likes Phil. One last shot at Phil. He reminds me of a mannequin. Especially those creepy ones at Marshall Fields in Chicago. No one may relate to that, but I had to get it off my chest.

08 – LaKisha (Kiki), God Bless The Child (5-2)

My wife calls her voice Nell Carter-ish. I can’t get “Gimme a break, I sure deserve it” out of my mind now. I don’t have much to say about LaKisha. I think she’s in a two-horse race with Melinda, but my allegiance is to Melinda, so I’m biased. I wouldn’t be angry if LaKisha won over Melinda. I don’t think LaKisha will win, but I do think she’ll also get a recording contract when it’s all said and done. Randy called it the perfect song choice. It was an unbelievable vocal, she didn’t overdo it and it was sensational. Paula called her a beautiful performer and her heart really comes through when she performs. Simon said you’ve either got it or you don’t, and she’s got it. Said her and Melinda are in a league of their own. If it’s not those 2 in the finale, something is wrong.

09 – Blake, You Keep Me Hanging On (6-1)

What was up with Blake’s get up tonight? He looked like Taco, doing Puttin’ On The Ritz. He was just missing the top hat and cane. The strobe lights were really bugging me during his performance. Liked the popping and locking. He must’ve bought that VHS of Darrin’s Dance Grooves (http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0301152/). I think Blake looks like Steve Zahn (Lenny in “That Thing You Do!”). Randy told him to not worry about Blake-izing every song. Let the classics be the classics. That’s tough advice though, as I explained before. Paula said that he could have a hit with that version. Simon didn’t get it at all. He didn’t sound as good as we’ve heard him before, but he’ll be fine. I think he tried thinking out of the box and it didn’t work out that well this week. At least he’s popular and will probably be safe to show us his brilliance once again. I think it’s between him and Chris Sligh to be the last guy standing, but it may be for 4^th place.

10 – Stephanie, Love Hangover (10-1)

Diana said that she had star quality. She wore a funky paisley dress that kinda reminded me of a kimono, but not really. Performance was okay but it she didn’t really nail it. The judges commented on that. Randy said that she forgot the words, but it was a perfect choice for her. Paula was waiting for the uptempo part but it never came. And that she should strive for better. Simon called it a strange arrangement, like it was a song intro and she didn’t close well. He added that she was totally upstaged by Melinda and LaKisha tonight. She’ll hang around, but she is in danger of eventually being forgotten.

11 – Chris Richardson, The Boss (10-1)

Is it me or does he look like Turtle from Entourage? I don’t really watch that show (we don’t get HBO anymore), but I’ve seen ads. CRich had an odd outfit on tonight, with the white blazer, colored shirt and white tie, with jeans and white shoes. It reminded me of a cruiseship performance. Randy said it wasn’t his favorite performance but the runs he connected on were hot, but half were good and half were bad. Paula said he nailed it, bringing the song up to date and that his vocals were great. Simon called his vocals dreadful. He said take the dance and personality out of it and it was horrible. I’m in between Simon and Paula. I like this guy, but not as much as Blake and Sligh.

12 – Jordin, If We Hold On Together (10-1)

Wore a nice prom dress tonight. I know that I said she looks like Mike Rico’s wife, but tonight she looked like someone else. Then it hit me. Callie O’Malley! From Grey’s Anatomy! Randy was so very impressed with her. Said she made it a 3 girl race. Paula called her a natural gift and a breath of fresh air (she says that a lot and it never means the same thing). Simon called it a little gooey, but he totally agreed that it was a very, very good vocal. I like Jordin a lot but still think she’s not in Melinda and LaKisha’s league. She could eventually jumpfrog Stephanie for third though. And that would be impressive.

I voted for Melinda, Chris Sligh, Blake and Jordin tonight. The bottom 3 should be Sanjaya, Haley and Brandon, but it will probably be Haley, Brandon and Phil or Gina. I think Haley or Brandon will be gone.

Until next week. And I appreciate comments back, so keep ‘em coming or start sending them back. Like last year, I’m posting these on Blogger.com again (http://airecaps.blogspot.com/). Feel free to pass along the e-mails or direct others to the blog. Everything for the last few years is posted on the website. And I apologize for any grammatical mistakes, as my wife is not here (she’s in Hawaii for work) to proofread.